“Take it or leave it”

Even when you are making your final offer, presenting the deal as a “take it or leave it” proposition is a mistake. Even if the other side accepts the offer, the deal leaves them feeling bad about the decision. Unbelievably, we have heard of people putting such an unpleasant tag on an offer that was otherwise okay. This label makes the offer sound bad even if the terms are reasonable. If you hear this phrase, evaluate the offer on the merits, not on the way it was delivered. Especially if you are a professional negotiator, figure out if the offer is acceptable based on what you want out of the negotiation.

Don’t let a bad negotiating style confuse you. If you are negotiating for yourself, and you must continue working with your counterpart in this deal, you may want to consider whether you can maintain an ongoing relationship with a person who is bullying you with “take it or leave it” statements. If you are making a final offer, say so without using the antagonistic take-it-orleave-it phrase. If you are feeling frustrated and anticipating a refusal, push the pause button. When you are feeling that way, it is hard to calmly explain the reasons that this must be the final offer. You are likely to use this verboten phrase (“Take it or leave it”) or something similar. That approach hurts you in the long run because you look like a bully. And you don’t increase the chance of your proposal being accepted.